You are allowed to not like people
You are allowed to simply have clashing personalities with someone
It does not make you or the other person inherently bad people to just not get along
You do not always need to justify your dislike in the court of public opinion or even announce it in any way.
For the record this is applicable to other things too, not just interpersonal relationships
Every tv show you dislike is not an Objectively Evil piece of media made by Objectively Evil people and it costs 0 dollars to NOT barge into peoples threads to tell them you disagree with their taste in shows and they should feel bad
It is never cute and only very rarely funny
The number of times i have seen otherwise reasonable people on here wade into a thread about, idk, star trek or something just to bluster about it being unwatchable and gene roddenberry being Satan or whatever the fuck
You really think anyone on this corner of the fedi cant compartmentalize? That if they like any one part if a show, they actually endorse 100% of its politics and the politics of its creator?
Come the fuck on, please be an adult
@swiff something ill never understand is how people have the energy to argue about something that doesn't matter, won't change anyone's mind, and functionally serves no purpose except to get mad
@hoppet thank you my only fear is that anyone might read it and think it is very specifically about them, when its supposed to be about a pattern. Im not attentive enough to the timeline to be deliberately singling any one person out about this lmfao
@swiff sometimes i preface posts with "i've been seeing a pattern lately and it's this" when i'm worried about that but i mean... you can't control incorrect conclusions other people draw about what you say
@swiff it sucks also to catch yourself doing this in the interpersonal relationships thing. my life has become immensely better the more and more i remember that it's okay if it's not my thing and that's fine and it doesn't make the other person morally evil, it just makes them not my cup of tea.
i'm going to selfishly blame a lot of the impulse on how shit works in school, especially if you make the mistake of being The Reasonable Student Who Doesn't Act Up In Class. you're asked to justify your social decisions and come prepared with a dissertation of good reasons. it can't just be that you don't like a person - or even that they're being mean to you, because then you're called upon to "be the bigger person" about it because you're "more mature". you get sucked into doing that enough times, in this environment of forced social structures (it's not like you can really choose which 4th grade class you're in), it becomes a habit. an absolutely fucking miserable habit that my life has improved significantly the more i try to dump it, lol
@swiff to add to this, just because a creator turns out to be a horrible person doesn't automatically make their work bad even if you no longer want to engage with it
@darkwitchclaire sometimes i agree and sometimes no. Its not at all uncommon, in my experience, that once i learn about a creators skeletons it sours me on their work, ESPECIALLY when it is clear in retrospect how much the way in which they are shitty is reflected in their work.
I think in a lot of cases it is a very personal question and requires context.
@darkwitchclaire And then theres some cases wherein evem if the authors shittiness is compartmentalized, what they specifically did was too heinous to separate-- it can taint great art by proximity.
In short, yes, youre right, but that particular question is extra sticky and impossible to apply a blanket rule to
@swiff i understand that and there definitely are times where it shows on their earlier work, but i'm referring specifically to when people decide to say a work is qualitatively bad for no other reason
@swiff One of the stupidest ironies of Fedi is the championing of "BlockandMuteAwarenessWeek" but then the moment someone gets blocked for being a dick to someone, they dump all over the TL and shit their pants about it.
Likewise, people do not need a dissertation in defense of blocking someone. They can just block them, they don't need to make shit up or keep a receipt book. Sometimes it can be as simple as "I don't like this person's attitude."
@swiff I really wish I could've imparted this wisdom onto a much younger version of myself, I might have made/kept more friends
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